And to be honest, it gives me hope for our future that you're comfortable enough with me to ... well ... state your judgments right to my face." That's just it: I don't want to judge you anymore, and I owe you an apology for how vicious I was the last time we really talked. It's a fucked-up situation all around. I want to be with you but I know that if I was I wouldn't be able to handle it, so I have to move on. Only I can't move on if I keep dwelling on you but I can't stop myself from loving you and so I try and do my best to avoid you and not think about you but the harder I try to stay away the more I find myself thinking about you and..." she trailed off and put her forehead in her hand, sighing in frustration."Hey, it's okay," I soothed.Just then, Brooke sat down beside her best friend and rubbed her back encouragingly."Deej ... It's your birthday," I said gently. "We're here to celebrate, not revisit old wounds." I directed that last part at Brooke, who smiled and nodded."I. “Steve’s been making a point that I need adult companionship and that Nicholas will be just fine. He’s right, even though it’s hard. But with Jesse and Kristin here, it’ll be OK.”“Let’s go see the kids,” Kathy said.We went to the kitchen and I greeted Nora who was setting a plate of cookies and glasses of milk in front of Jesse and Kristin. I watched and smiled as Jesse waited for Kristin to take her two cookies. We’d been working on manners, and he was getting better, though it was easier to get him to do it with kids outside the family than with his half-siblings.“Hi, Steve, Kathy, Kurt,” Nora said. “Did you need lunch?”“We ate on the way down,” Kathy said.“OK. The kids will eat at 5:00pm and then we’ll do the cake and presents. I hope you adults can handle having dessert first, before your meal!”“I think we’ll manage,” Kurt said with a laugh.“Jesse, thank you for writing the letter about Nicholas’ dad,” Nora said.“I wanted the bad man to never hurt anyone again!” Jesse said.“He.
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